I DID IT - HELP!!!!!!!
I am not sure quite what I was thinking, but I have applied through QTAC for a university place next year to study Creative writing. Wow! I am taking a really big breath at the moment, at the enormity of what I have decided to do.
The funny thing is that Ivan is away and I haven't even had a chance to tell him about it yet, or even discuss it with him. I just decided all by myself.
For a long time now I have been wondering what I am going to do with the next 40-50 years of my life and I realised that I love writing. Yes, you can all see that by the number of emails and Blogs that I put out everyday. This is the one thing that "is my music inside!"
I have over the past couple of weeks been investigating the courses online at UQ (University of Queensland) and there are some wonderful English and writing courses, so today, while at Uni with Elizabeth, I made some enquiries, received some information and came home and applied.
I will not know until January whether I have been offered a place asI have had to provide all sorts of documentation. I tell you, trying to dig out school results and Uni results and Tafe results and employment records. What a job! Still it looks fairly impressive so far, so everyone wish me luck.
If I get accepted, I will start off part-time I think, with just one or maybe two courses (1/2 a normal course load) and see how I cope. The best part of all of this is that for the first time in my life I am not afraid of failing. For so long I have been afraid to try anything new - in case I failed! I have however, realised that I cannot fail. I can only succeed to the best of my ability and if I decide it is not for me, then that is also okay, as I am sampling life to decide what I want to do.
I am going to let my 'music sing'. I am going to enjoy studying and expanding my knowledge and skills. I am going to be accepted into Uni for 2009. So what are you doing to follow your star?
Beverly
My personal thoughts & dreams to inspire family & friends
Monday, October 6, 2008
Monday morning thoughts
I wonder what it is about Mondays? Even though today the children don't have to go to school, (they head back tomorrow) I woke up this morning and my first thought was 'Oh no its Monday!' The traffic started a little earlier outside the bedroom window. Abby (our dog) had a lot more to say to the neighbourhood as more people were up walking early, and my thoughts went into overdrive. This is unlike a Sunday morning, which for some reason is the one day when every thought is always slow and easy in the morning.
Today is a busy day for Elizabeth and I. She discovered late yesterday that her Myth, magic and Religion essay which she thought was due on the 9th, is actually due today the 6th. Big Ooops! Luckily yesterday, she had spent the day doing everything possible to complete it. By 4.00pm however, we realised that it was going to need some time spent on it today. Now that would have been good as it is still holidays and we had plenty time. But the pressure of knowing that by 5.00pm it has to be handed in, added a lot of stress and pressure. So the two of us are heading into the University this morning. I am going to find books for her Bibliography and she is going to work on a few last paragraphs. I must admit I have learnt so much about the cults of Cybele and Isis in Ancient Rome over the last few days, while I have typed for her as she dictated her thoughts. It is fascinating and makes me realise how easy it has become to allow my brain to stagnate over the last 24 years. I am not sure I could go back to University and study myself (although I keep toying with the idea of doing a creative writing course next year), but I am learning all the time and loving it. Thanks Elizabeth, I know you worry that you are adding to my workload - it is fun to do something so different.
Sarah and Matthew are having their hair trimmed for school (thanks Mom for taking care of that for me) and then it is a day to pack their bags and get organised. Polish the school shoes and find their hats and belongings. Hopefully their lunch boxes were emptied at the end of the holidays, or they could have grown a new life form by now! Only joking! I did check! They have just 9 weeks left of school this year, so that is going to be a busy time for us all.
As you can see my "Monday" brain is in full swing this morning.
Remember today's thought - Happiness is contagious! Be a carrier! and have a great Monday.
Today is a busy day for Elizabeth and I. She discovered late yesterday that her Myth, magic and Religion essay which she thought was due on the 9th, is actually due today the 6th. Big Ooops! Luckily yesterday, she had spent the day doing everything possible to complete it. By 4.00pm however, we realised that it was going to need some time spent on it today. Now that would have been good as it is still holidays and we had plenty time. But the pressure of knowing that by 5.00pm it has to be handed in, added a lot of stress and pressure. So the two of us are heading into the University this morning. I am going to find books for her Bibliography and she is going to work on a few last paragraphs. I must admit I have learnt so much about the cults of Cybele and Isis in Ancient Rome over the last few days, while I have typed for her as she dictated her thoughts. It is fascinating and makes me realise how easy it has become to allow my brain to stagnate over the last 24 years. I am not sure I could go back to University and study myself (although I keep toying with the idea of doing a creative writing course next year), but I am learning all the time and loving it. Thanks Elizabeth, I know you worry that you are adding to my workload - it is fun to do something so different.
Sarah and Matthew are having their hair trimmed for school (thanks Mom for taking care of that for me) and then it is a day to pack their bags and get organised. Polish the school shoes and find their hats and belongings. Hopefully their lunch boxes were emptied at the end of the holidays, or they could have grown a new life form by now! Only joking! I did check! They have just 9 weeks left of school this year, so that is going to be a busy time for us all.
As you can see my "Monday" brain is in full swing this morning.
Remember today's thought - Happiness is contagious! Be a carrier! and have a great Monday.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Roses for Spring
Spring is the perfect time of the year in Brisbane, the humidity and heat of summer have not arrived yet and my winter pruned roses are in full bloom. The view from my study window is so beautiful and the gentle breezes waft in the most divine smells of the traditional, old-fashioned roses that Ivan planted for me. I am always torn as to whether to cut a vase full for the house, or to leave them blooming so beautifully on the bushes.
I have an amazing collection of colours, including a beautiful 'blue rose' that is almost lilac in colour. It is special to Ivan as it is the same cultivar as a rose his Mum grew in her garden when he was a child. My special yellow rose that Matthew bought me for my first Christmas in Brisbane is also strong and healthy.
Yellow roses of course are my total favourites, these were the colour of my wedding bouquet and they represent friendship! I also love the stunningly deep red of an old-fashioned rose that has a fragrance that draws you in for a breath.
The photos above are of the ones that are in full bloom today, as others come into their own, I will share them with you all.
I hope you enjoy my Rose Garden!
The Fourth Secret.
Embrace Silence is the fourth Secret. Wayne Dyer talks about the value of Silence. He talks about the monentary silence in the space between your thoughts that you can become aware, of if you practice. It is here that you will find peace. Do you know that the average person has around 60,000 separate thoughts in a day - Wow!!!! I know somedays this must be even more. "I have to do the dishes, the laundry, take the kids to school, fetch them, get to work, what to wear, what to eat"............ and so it goes from the moment we wake.
Now I love his idea that if we can merge into that silence, that single gap, between thoughts we can connect to our Source and find the peace that some people call God. Psalms of the Old Testament says "Be still and know that I am God" Still means silence, still means stop thinking.
Another wonderful way of looking at the silence is the space between the notes of music. Without the space it would be one continuous cacophony of sound. Each note emerges from the silence, not from the noise.
I love the silence of my home, I seldom have a radio on when I am alone. Of course sometimes I enjoy the most amazing music and it lights up my soul, or I watch a bit of TV. But I often work in silence. The problem is that often that silence is filled with the noise of my very, very busy 60,000 thoughts.
Meditation is very difficult for most people. The moment you try to still your mind, thoughts pop in. I guess the idea is that we keep practicing and try and find the space between the thoughts. Focus on a phrase or a word and allow that to help you. Ritualised prayer helps many, especially when said slowly and with feeling. It is not the words, but the spaces that create the connection and the peace.
I guess the other idea is that when you have peace and silence in your soul you radiate a different kind of energy. It creates a shield around you that deflects negative energies. Remember, you attract what you give out! (Secret No 3).
Answers also come from silence, so if you have a problem don't worry it with thousands of thoughts, give it to silence and allow the silence to inspire and heal you.
Nature also is filled with silence! Now for all of us who are waking at 4.45am to the sound of the Dawn Chorus, I am sure that is not very helpful and does not seem true. But when you are out in Nature and you breathe with the planet, taking away all the noises we make to fill the void that we are afraid to experience, we are fulfilled. We are re-energised. Remember that day at the beach or in the forest, up a mountain or when you stood in silence and awe at Nature around you. I always feel like I am drinking in the sights and sounds and filling not my stomach or my mind, but my soul.
I hope this little post helps you find the silence you need for your life. Thanks again to this amazing book and many others which are helping me grow and find a new Me, no I think it is just allowing the true Me to finally emerge unafraid and powerful.
Have a wonderful day.
Beverly
Now I love his idea that if we can merge into that silence, that single gap, between thoughts we can connect to our Source and find the peace that some people call God. Psalms of the Old Testament says "Be still and know that I am God" Still means silence, still means stop thinking.
Another wonderful way of looking at the silence is the space between the notes of music. Without the space it would be one continuous cacophony of sound. Each note emerges from the silence, not from the noise.
I love the silence of my home, I seldom have a radio on when I am alone. Of course sometimes I enjoy the most amazing music and it lights up my soul, or I watch a bit of TV. But I often work in silence. The problem is that often that silence is filled with the noise of my very, very busy 60,000 thoughts.
Meditation is very difficult for most people. The moment you try to still your mind, thoughts pop in. I guess the idea is that we keep practicing and try and find the space between the thoughts. Focus on a phrase or a word and allow that to help you. Ritualised prayer helps many, especially when said slowly and with feeling. It is not the words, but the spaces that create the connection and the peace.
I guess the other idea is that when you have peace and silence in your soul you radiate a different kind of energy. It creates a shield around you that deflects negative energies. Remember, you attract what you give out! (Secret No 3).
Answers also come from silence, so if you have a problem don't worry it with thousands of thoughts, give it to silence and allow the silence to inspire and heal you.
Nature also is filled with silence! Now for all of us who are waking at 4.45am to the sound of the Dawn Chorus, I am sure that is not very helpful and does not seem true. But when you are out in Nature and you breathe with the planet, taking away all the noises we make to fill the void that we are afraid to experience, we are fulfilled. We are re-energised. Remember that day at the beach or in the forest, up a mountain or when you stood in silence and awe at Nature around you. I always feel like I am drinking in the sights and sounds and filling not my stomach or my mind, but my soul.
I hope this little post helps you find the silence you need for your life. Thanks again to this amazing book and many others which are helping me grow and find a new Me, no I think it is just allowing the true Me to finally emerge unafraid and powerful.
Have a wonderful day.
Beverly
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Secrets for success and inner peace
A while back I wrote about the book I am reading by Dr Wayne Dyer. I shared some of the info I gleaned from Secret Number One (Have a mind that is open to everything and attached to nothing) in my garden email and I have over the past week or two taken one secret at a time and digested it for a few days. My plan was to try and write about each one as I understood and processed it. Holidays and visitors and lots of other distrations have distracted me from this, but I just want to share in brief a few of the ideas I have gained so far. I hope Dr Dyer doesn't mind me sharing his ideas with you, but I have found myself thinking and learning everyday from this simple beautiful little book.
Secret Number Two, was wonderful: "Don't die with your music still in you."
Point to yourself - do it now! Where did you point? Was it to your brain or was it to your heart? Listen to your heart, find your passion for living. Be inspired the word means 'in spirit'. Can you remember a moment of inspiration when everything clicked. You did not have to think, it just worked - A wow moment. This is the true connection with what you are supposed to be doing. Are you going to be a commuter through life, just doing the things you have to do or are you going to find that true purpose which is your music? I love this line: "You'll never be at peace if you don't get that music out and let it play. Let the world know why you're here, and do it with passion."
I also loved Secret Number Three: "You can't give away what you don't have."
This one seems really obvious at first, yet on reading it I discovered a far deeper truth. Dr Dyer starts out by talking about 'attractor energy'. Thoughts are a form of energy and you get back what you put into the world. It is also what you have to give away to others. If inside you there is anger and self-disrespect that is what you will give out to the world and in return attract back to you. But if you fill your thoughts and life with love and self-respect this is what you can give away and in turn attract back. He also talks about finding our purpose. Everyone is different and like in number two, we will all dance to our own music. Our purpose however, is only really that important if we can remember to make the purpose of our life about giving and giving love above all. Do you have that love to give away, do you possess the love for yourself?
In some ways these two ideas provoke some deep philisophical thoughts, but what a wonderful world we would create if eveyone of us, could follow these secrets.
I know someone who after struggling for many years with depression and self-doubt, chose to make someone else happy every single day. That was the goal they set, not a goal to feel better, not a goal to heal themselves, but to give to someone else the thing that they most wanted. This person is amazing! Everyone I know who meets her will tell you she has energy and a zest for living that is unbelievable. It was not done by fixing her problems, but rather by giving to the world the one thing that she wanted most and she found that she has it inside her to give. This special person is my Mom! I don't tell her enough how amazing she is, but just by that one simple act, she inspires me and many that get to know her.
Secret number Four is: "Embrace Silence". I will however, leave you with silence, for now. I hope that I have given you something wonderful to think about. If you want to read more Dr Wayne Dyer's book is called "10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace". Or wait for my next Inspiration Blog.
Beverly
Secret Number Two, was wonderful: "Don't die with your music still in you."
Point to yourself - do it now! Where did you point? Was it to your brain or was it to your heart? Listen to your heart, find your passion for living. Be inspired the word means 'in spirit'. Can you remember a moment of inspiration when everything clicked. You did not have to think, it just worked - A wow moment. This is the true connection with what you are supposed to be doing. Are you going to be a commuter through life, just doing the things you have to do or are you going to find that true purpose which is your music? I love this line: "You'll never be at peace if you don't get that music out and let it play. Let the world know why you're here, and do it with passion."
I also loved Secret Number Three: "You can't give away what you don't have."
This one seems really obvious at first, yet on reading it I discovered a far deeper truth. Dr Dyer starts out by talking about 'attractor energy'. Thoughts are a form of energy and you get back what you put into the world. It is also what you have to give away to others. If inside you there is anger and self-disrespect that is what you will give out to the world and in return attract back to you. But if you fill your thoughts and life with love and self-respect this is what you can give away and in turn attract back. He also talks about finding our purpose. Everyone is different and like in number two, we will all dance to our own music. Our purpose however, is only really that important if we can remember to make the purpose of our life about giving and giving love above all. Do you have that love to give away, do you possess the love for yourself?
In some ways these two ideas provoke some deep philisophical thoughts, but what a wonderful world we would create if eveyone of us, could follow these secrets.
I know someone who after struggling for many years with depression and self-doubt, chose to make someone else happy every single day. That was the goal they set, not a goal to feel better, not a goal to heal themselves, but to give to someone else the thing that they most wanted. This person is amazing! Everyone I know who meets her will tell you she has energy and a zest for living that is unbelievable. It was not done by fixing her problems, but rather by giving to the world the one thing that she wanted most and she found that she has it inside her to give. This special person is my Mom! I don't tell her enough how amazing she is, but just by that one simple act, she inspires me and many that get to know her.
Secret number Four is: "Embrace Silence". I will however, leave you with silence, for now. I hope that I have given you something wonderful to think about. If you want to read more Dr Wayne Dyer's book is called "10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace". Or wait for my next Inspiration Blog.
Beverly
Friday, October 3, 2008
Special needs
I know that there is a very special poem that was written about 'children with special needs' (I will try and find it and publish it on Vesta-poetry) It is how God looked down to Earth and specially chose their parents. I remember reading it a very long time ago and thinking how wonderful those parents would be.
I now realise that I have been specially chosen by God, just for my children. They are three wonderfully gifted, talented, special and amazingly 'needful' children. God chose our family to place them and I thank him every day.
I know that there are times when I despair that I cannot fix or help them, times when they endure problems and suffering. Times when I wish that I could just take it all away from them, but I realise that they have been placed with me for a reason. I am the person that is best suited to be their Mommy.
Today Matthew endured another day at the orthodontist. He had his second expander fitted! Over the next four weeks, we will turn the key every second day and push his teeth apart. It will affect his speech, his eating and also I am sure cause him discomfit. I have always said that when God gave him his cleft lip and palate, he gave him the strength and humour to cope with the problems and pain. Matthew's theory is that he was going to be born perfect, but God decided that was not fair to the world, so had to 'deform' him in some way. See the humour!!!
Our beautiful Elizabeth is struggling at the moment, she needs our love and support to get her through this time in her life. We are here for her and will take care of her until she is able once more to stand tall and strong and conquer the world in her wonderful indomitable manner.
Little Sarah is our 'magical' child! She is so strong and determined and yet so vulnerable and insecure. She was born with a purpose and I know that when she finds it - it is going to be "Look out world!"
Am I up to this task? Yes, I think I am. God never gives us more challenges that we can cope with. He puts us in the right place, at the right time, and if we only open ourselves to the power of his gifts, we can reign supreme. I am blessed to be the Mother of my wonderful children. I know that this is one of the reasons I have lived the life that I have, so that I can raise them to share with the world their amazing gifts, love and talents.
My wish is that every parent experiences the love that I have for my children and that every child finds the true love that they deserve from the parents that God gave them.
I now realise that I have been specially chosen by God, just for my children. They are three wonderfully gifted, talented, special and amazingly 'needful' children. God chose our family to place them and I thank him every day.
I know that there are times when I despair that I cannot fix or help them, times when they endure problems and suffering. Times when I wish that I could just take it all away from them, but I realise that they have been placed with me for a reason. I am the person that is best suited to be their Mommy.
Today Matthew endured another day at the orthodontist. He had his second expander fitted! Over the next four weeks, we will turn the key every second day and push his teeth apart. It will affect his speech, his eating and also I am sure cause him discomfit. I have always said that when God gave him his cleft lip and palate, he gave him the strength and humour to cope with the problems and pain. Matthew's theory is that he was going to be born perfect, but God decided that was not fair to the world, so had to 'deform' him in some way. See the humour!!!
Our beautiful Elizabeth is struggling at the moment, she needs our love and support to get her through this time in her life. We are here for her and will take care of her until she is able once more to stand tall and strong and conquer the world in her wonderful indomitable manner.
Little Sarah is our 'magical' child! She is so strong and determined and yet so vulnerable and insecure. She was born with a purpose and I know that when she finds it - it is going to be "Look out world!"
Am I up to this task? Yes, I think I am. God never gives us more challenges that we can cope with. He puts us in the right place, at the right time, and if we only open ourselves to the power of his gifts, we can reign supreme. I am blessed to be the Mother of my wonderful children. I know that this is one of the reasons I have lived the life that I have, so that I can raise them to share with the world their amazing gifts, love and talents.
My wish is that every parent experiences the love that I have for my children and that every child finds the true love that they deserve from the parents that God gave them.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Busy holidays
I love the school holidays. I gain about 2 hours everyday by not doing the school drop off and pickup. I also don't have to make those dreaded school lunches - that usually come home again, uneaten! The other major blessing is no ironing of school uniforms. I think I am going to ban school. Are there any downsides to school holidays for me - No I don't think so! I get to lie-in and the children are not grumpy. They are seldom bored and we enjoy each others company. So I am with the children - NO SCHOOL!!!!
These holidays have been fun. We have had family visiting from Canberra (Ivan's brother and nephew). Matthew was in heaven with Dean around for 5 days. They played snooker, air-hockey, badmington, PS2, computer games and swam. We never saw them from morning to night, unless it was for food. They also had a great day at Movieworld together, just the 2 Dads and the 2 boys! I am glad I did not go! Matthew went on the Scoobie Doo ride about 9 times, Dean and Alistair also did the Superman ride - No way! I am not good with rollercoasters.
We have also had lots of appointments these holidays. Sarah got her new glasses for reading, and Ivan's new glasses also arrived. Matthew had his visit to the cleft clinic and they were please with his progress. The best news is that we don't have to seem them for 2 years now, instead of every year. The girls and I have den
tist appointments this afternoon - Yuck! and Matthew is having his 'expander' fitted to his mouth tomorrow. This is not going to be at all nice! I will have to get back into turning it everyday.
Elizabeth is working hard on University assignments as she only has 3 weeks left of classes before her exams and then she is finished her first year at Uni. Wow!
2008 has flown by! I am already contemplating Christmas cards and have started my Christmas shopping. The shops all have their Christmas trees and baubles up for sale. Seems a bit early for that for me, but I guess it is now only 8 weeks until December.
Hope you are all enjoying your holidays.
These holidays have been fun. We have had family visiting from Canberra (Ivan's brother and nephew). Matthew was in heaven with Dean around for 5 days. They played snooker, air-hockey, badmington, PS2, computer games and swam. We never saw them from morning to night, unless it was for food. They also had a great day at Movieworld together, just the 2 Dads and the 2 boys! I am glad I did not go! Matthew went on the Scoobie Doo ride about 9 times, Dean and Alistair also did the Superman ride - No way! I am not good with rollercoasters.
We have also had lots of appointments these holidays. Sarah got her new glasses for reading, and Ivan's new glasses also arrived. Matthew had his visit to the cleft clinic and they were please with his progress. The best news is that we don't have to seem them for 2 years now, instead of every year. The girls and I have den
tist appointments this afternoon - Yuck! and Matthew is having his 'expander' fitted to his mouth tomorrow. This is not going to be at all nice! I will have to get back into turning it everyday. Elizabeth is working hard on University assignments as she only has 3 weeks left of classes before her exams and then she is finished her first year at Uni. Wow!
2008 has flown by! I am already contemplating Christmas cards and have started my Christmas shopping. The shops all have their Christmas trees and baubles up for sale. Seems a bit early for that for me, but I guess it is now only 8 weeks until December.
Hope you are all enjoying your holidays.
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