End of my first week at Uni

I survived!

Yes, I must admit that it feels like survival. The excitement of my first day was quickly replaced by the reality of Day two. I was quite enthused at the beginning, but after a 3 hour lecture/tutorial combination, I was less excited about the whole process.

I enjoyed the content and learnt quite a bit, but also began to remember why I hated school! We had to get into discussion groups and the lecturer kept throwing questions out there for people to answer.

Now being a 40+ year old back at Uni, I have lots of thoughts and opinions on most things, they are probably not always right, but I love to think about things and share my thoughts with other like-minded people. In a group of around 80 students I soon discovered that the contributions came from less than 10% and always the same students. Hmmm! Not sure either that my sense of humour went over that well.

My internal dialogue immediately shifted to the 'shut-up Beverly' syndrome and when we had to turn around and discuss things with the group behind us, I found myself, joining into a group of 3 who all knew each other. Again I heard messages from my past of "Oh no, how am I going to fit in?"

I have found it fascinating and interesting to analyse these thoughts today and realise that my own history will very easily influence my current reality, if I allow it to do so.

At the end of the day, I also discovered that my frustrations and tiredness, spilled over into my other subjects, when I could not figure out how to find the 'required readings.' I sent off an email to my lecturer asking for help and this morning - Yes a new Day! I received a reply, found the readings and discovered that I had even done them already. So life improved dramatically!

Once more I stand ready to take another step forward, I know that I will need to keep taking these steps. I am learning to create the dialogue that is positive and uplifting and try to ignore the negative messages.

A successful and exciting reading for 'Creative Writing', a completed Tutorial worksheet for Week two and a plan in place to deal with the rest, now sees me in a happier frame of mind. I even felt like I could sit down and do some more writing, but 3D life and my beautiful Sarah's birthday needs called, so on the back burner for now my writing must go. But lookout world I am thinking again!