I am reading an excellent book called 'How we choose to be happy' by Rick Foster & Greg Hicks. It is all about intention and the 8 secrets of happy people. I have realised that one of the reasons I am a happy person is that I have chosen to be happy.
Now along with this, I also have a strong drive to choose my path in life. For the past 2 years I have chosen to attend university - it has brought me satisfaction, pride and fulfillment. From the beginning of this year, it did not bring me happiness. I have been conflicted all year.
The reason: it is conflicting with my priorities in life:
The one thing that makes me happy and has always been my top priority is my family. I have wanted to be a Wife and a Mum for as long as I can remember - it is who I am.
As I have progressed along the path of student, this has been in conflict, especially with the issues that my children have faced over the past 2 years. So I have made a decision:
I am putting my studies on hold. The knot that has sat in my tummy for months now, dissipated - I felt at peace and I smiled. I am going to miss it, I am still grieving for the attention and accolades that I get for being a good student, but . . .
all of these things are external and 'happiness' is internal.
So, I am back to being a full-time Mum, a wife and a housewife.
Sarah is going to home-school full-time with me for this year. I will teach and nurture her and get her back on the path of confidence and success. My home will be a place of pride again and I will be able to have the time to enjoy my marriage, my hobbies and my life . . . and yes my writing (in all its forms).
I am blessed that I can make these choices, but most of all I am blessed that I know what makes me HAPPY.
3 comments:
I know that this has been a difficult time for you over the past few months, the spark had gone out of your eyes as well. Now that you have taken charge of your happiness I know that everything else will fall into place, obviously not without a lot of effort. Just remember we are always here if you need us and both Dad and I are sure that you will be an anchor for Sarah during the next few years. You have always been a a good Mother, Wife, and for us the most wonderful daughter
Beverly you are a very wise lady, you are choosing your happiness over your pursuit of an education. I can't even imagine how difficult your decision has been but good for you, I hope your heart dances time and time again. You are blessed to have the choices that you do.
Currently I'm facing a block of some type, I just want this semester to be done and over with. I don't know if it's the weather or I need a break or what it is but I'm going to find out what it is and resolve it... soon I hope! I'm going on a mini holiday with all of my children, my son's wife and my granddaughter to the mountains in the middle of April, I hope this is what I need! I can't wait.
Have a fantastic day! And I'm sure that Sarah will be pleased as punch that you're going to home school.
Happy Home Schooling!! Now I feel Kind of bad that I have your books here... :) Maybe I need to make a trip to Oz and bring them back... :) Actually, I think that likely the best field trip for little miss would be a Mongolian Adventure. Just sayin!. We must actually talk soon!
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